If I had met her recently instead of years ago,would we even be friends right now?What drives two friends to drift apart anyway?Back in the day we always used to say BFF,and  especially the forever part which would be said with pride whenever someone asked, very confidently as if we were so sure.That’s the beauty of being a kid I guess.The innocence and naivety.

Fast forward years later,to this stage in life society suspiciously refers to as  ‘young adult’.Our choices in life separate us.Let me explain,I have studied abroad from my home country Malaysia for some time now and all the while I’ve been able to maintain longterm friendships that have preceded the seven year mark.My friends at home have reached the acceptable milestones within our culture that ultimately define them in the society I grew up in.Examples being getting married with children,delaying a masters education,continuing to live with the parents until they get married,an unsuitable job that they stick with just because it pleases the parents, blablabla..

I,on the other hand have been exposed to the polar opposite now that I’ve been away.

Time just flies when I’m with other like minded college friends,with aspirations that are always more up my alley.Debating art,politics,that sort of thing.Obviously,that has affected me now and I have other ambitions from my childhood friends.

And then I come home for the holidays.It’s hard whenever we get together supposedly chit chatting but really dissecting the other’s life whether or not its better than our lives.I admit I get bored of the same exhausting mindless chatter.As selfish as it sounds,all I really want to do is to scream “you made a choice,deal with it”.

I don’t judge.its their choice to do as they please and at the end of the day,if they’re happy I’m happy.But also,I can’t help but wonder,

Do I maintain these friendships because I really enjoy their company or is it a sign of habit out of mere obligation?


3 thoughts on “I’ll get hell for this…but whatever.

  1. I really love this post. It got me thinking about my ex-best friend and how we would always say that we were going to stay best friend until the statue of liberty sunk. It’s still standing but our friendship isn’t the same. I’m glad to know that others around me feel the same being around people where everything has changed.

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